Only a child so quick-witted as Clemency Pogue, upon finding herself attacked by a wicked, invincible fairy, would remember a lesson learned from the story of Peter Pan. She shouts "I don't believe in fairies," and when it doesn't work, keeps shouting it until the horrible little creature drops as dead as a gossamer-winged doorknob. But then a mischievous hobgoblin arrives to tell Clem that she's killed six other fairies around the globe, some bad, but mostly good. Even if it was a mistake, it's now Clem's duty to set the world aright.

In his hilarious, action-packed debut novel, JT Petty does for burlap pants what holes have done for Swiss cheese.