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365 Quotes for a Daily Dose of Dry Humor

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Satirical quotes for every day

Whether in everyday life or on special events: An appropriate quote can save any situation and provide new momentum. How-ever, if you want to stand out from the crowd and show character, you need to demonstrate originality. My suggestion: humor. Brutal-ly truthful and slightly mean humor, to be precise. Instead of tor-menting your fellow human beings with corny positive banter, you can turn the tables and hand out a few snappy sayings.

Dry humor disguised as original quotes

An atrocious quip at the right time invigorates every relationship, shakes things up and creates a new perspective. It's not about of-fending the other person (at least not permanently), but solely about the surprising impulse and the shared joy of a little blunt-ness.

The ultimate collection of satirical quotes

The quotes in this book come from writers, politicians, scientists, actors, artists and other important personalities. In short: from suc-cessful people who have achieved great things and developed a passion for sarcastic remarks and subtle jibes. I would like to pass this curious collection on to you.

A cheeky quote every day

In this book, each day of the year has its own quote. Although I have assigned each quote to a specific date, this does not mean that you have to follow my pre-selection. You can read the book in a criss-cross fashion and remind yourself of your favorite sayings over and over again. I have also categorized the quotes themati-cally so that you can quickly find the most (in)appropriate words for special occasions such as birthdays, weddings or family celebra-tions.

A little foretaste

15th January:

“An intelligent man sometimes needs to be drunk to spend time with idiots.”

- Ernest Hemingway

11th February:

“In old age, children are a comfort as long as they don't come to visit you.”

- Sarah Bernhardt

18th March:

“You never know what's going to happen in this world. I'll just keep my mouth shut. That's a good idea.”

- Gertrude Stein

1st April:

“In our time there is a lot of talk about irony and humor, especially by people who have never been able to practice it.”

- Søren Kierkegaard

4th May:

“There may be better air in heaven, but there is certainly better company in hell.”

- George Bernard Shaw

27th June:

“There are many people I would like to miss right now.”

- Tomi Ungerer

4th July:

“The men of today are also no longer what they have never been.”

- Kylie Minogue

6th August:

“Digging a pit for others is exhausting, but it almost always pays off.”

- David Herbert Lawrence

26th September:

“The best proof of knowledge of human nature is quiet homicidal desires.”

- Frank Sinatra

20th October:

“Silent people become even more boring when they start talking.”

- Jane Austen

15th November:

“Gloating is a never-ending source of strength and serenity.”

- Frank Billings Kellogg

24th December:

“A family reunion is not only the fault of those who host it, but also of those who do not prevent it.”

- Karl Kraus

Always a proper saying on hand

In this book 365 mean quotes are waiting for you so that you can pick up a new dose of dry humor and quick wit every day. The next time you want to "surprise" your partner, have a ready saying for your colleague at the office, or you need a little cheering up your-self, you can open this treasure trove of quotes, read a few lines and then hit the ground running with new energy.