New Age diva Squirrelly Chicane—the hottest channeler the side of Atlantis—has made millions getting high on the afterlife. So when a delegation of Himalayan holy men convince a very stoned Squirrelly that she's an incarnation of the Bunji Lama, she figures ruling their little country would be a kick.

But big bad China is playing a game of turf war—and Tibet is the unlucky first contestant. The holy underdogs hoped that an American national on the throne-even one as nuts as Squirrelly—would keep the bullies away. Not! Now, the U.S. is sitting on a powder keg. Solution: send in Remo and Chiun with some free tickets to paradise.