Old dogs may have trouble with new tricks, but now canine brainiacs can use the laws of physics to master their corner of the universe. Complete with technical illustrations, graphs, and formulas, this book shows dogs how to: Bring down the mailman with the correct ratio of stealth and brute force Poop strategically—indoors and out—by understanding variable-mass systems Open any cupboard with Newton's First Law Play fetch by calculating velocity and maximum range Catch squirrels by accounting for friction, weight, and air resistance And much, much more! With this hilariously prescriptive how-to, pooches of every size and temperament will learn to chase cars—and catch them!