"But what about me?"
"Is it possible to go one day without dealing with the survivor's issues?"
"Will we ever make love again?"
"Will the survivor love me in the end?"
"How do I know if I should throw in the towel?"
Based on in-depth interviews and her workshops for partners across the country, Laura Davis offers practical advice and encouragement to all partnersâgirlfriends, boyfriends, spouses, and loversâtrying to support the survivors in their lives while tending to their own needs along the way. She shows couples how to deepen compassion, improve communication, and develop an understanding of healing as a shared activity. Addressing partners' most important questions, Allies in Healing covers:
The Basicsâanswers common questions about sexual abuse. Allies in Healingâintroduces key concepts of working and growing together. My Needs and Feelingsâteaches partners to recognize, value, and express their own needs. Dealing with Crisisâincludes strategies for handling suicidal feelings, regression, and hopelessness. Intimacy and Communicationâoffers practical advice on dealing with distancing, control, trust, and fighting. Sexâprovides guidelines for coping with flashbacks, lack of desire, differences in sexual needs, and frustration. Family lssuesâsuggests a range of ideas for interacting with the survivor's family. Partners' Storiesâexplores the struggles, triumphs, and courage of eight partners.